Category Comedy

Trump Attends Dogfighting Match – The Onion

LAS VEGAS—Speaking enthusiastically about what he called “a beautiful sport,” President Donald Trump attended a match Monday for the Ultimate Dogfighting Championship. “That’s it, bite his throat! Bite his throat!” said Trump, who sat next to podcaster Joe Rogan in the…

Build-A-Bear Stock Outperforms Nvidia – The Onion

Build-a-Bear Workshop’s stock, defying the threat of tariffs on its Chinese-sourced inventory, has surged over 2,000% in the past 5 years, outpacing Wall Street darlings such as Nvidia and Palantir. What do you think? “It’s a brilliant business move to…

Office Adds Area For Lactating Mothers To Discreetly Pump Iron

TUCSON, AZ—In a move that has earned praise from women’s rights advocates, local business Leiderman Insurance reportedly unveiled a dedicated space Friday for lactating mothers to discreetly pump iron in the office. “It’s essential that employers provide a private, functional…